Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
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