if only i could text you this smell
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
This gyro tastes like lonliness
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
