i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
