I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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