VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
