There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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