You're a womanizer and a bitch.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
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