She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
