Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize