Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
