I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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