i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
