WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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