Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
