So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
