But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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