I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Just puked most of my soul out..
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize