To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
