You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
how does that bad decision feel?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize