I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
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