Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
