Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
