Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Randomize