Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
