How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Let's get the cat blown out
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked