You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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