yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.