Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
