guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Randomize
