He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
