this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
