Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Threesome in a minivan. New low
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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