question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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