I accidentally had phone sex last night
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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