i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Randomize
