I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
