The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize