what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a dumb baby whore.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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