he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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