id be glad to
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
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