Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Randomize
