I'm going to jail i love you
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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