i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
