did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
You pole danced in your parka.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
