Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize