i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Randomize