do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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