what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!