Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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