You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
