doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
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that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
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Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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