He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
